Painful Reminders

Every time I’m faced with death, my mind races to the people that know it best. The wives, husbands, children, parents, and best friends of those recently gone too soon.

It starts to hurt, then the guilt sets in, feeling bad for feeling bad, because I have no idea what it’s like to lose someone so close.

Not comfortable feeling the pain because the full pain has never been mine to own.

When my grandpa died, I cried thinking of my mom, when my friend may or may not have killed himself, I cried seeing his best friends mourn. When Grosso died, the video of him dancing with his son brought tears.

When Keith passed, the bonds at Deluxe made it all hit at once.

It’s an odd feeling when seeing the pain of someone you love makes you cry.

When your tears start from seeing theirs.

It’s hard not to see some beauty in it.

Their pain reminds you how much you care.

How much you believe in the families, communities, friendships you have.

How lucky we are to share life’s experience, the good and the bad.